Eye Opener

Me and Tuese @ Millenia Hotel

It’s funny…really, this time last month
with ALL my strength and knowledge
I found myself gasping for air
and struggling to keep my head above water
stressed over the simple things

such as lunch money and taxi fares

phone bills, water bills and cash powers

putting food on the table was a burden

waking up in the morning was a struggle

planning ahead was a painful lie

even smiling was hard work

Somehow I was doing something wrong

But what?

I took care of my family

I put food on the table

I pay the bills

I feed my nephews

I am guardian to my nieces

I clean the house

I wash the dishes

I teach the kids right from wrong

What could I have possibly been doing wrong?

And then….

God opened my eyes

And I now see myself in a very different light

I regretfully sigh at my sweat shed in vain

For I now see where I’ve been

And past mistakes are now obvious as light in the dark

Everything I did was right

But my heart was in the wrong place

My actions were well

But my trust was put on the wrong being

I now learn with a heavy heart

Of my self created stress

I have learned that I was a big fool

to put trust in man and not God

I was a fool to allow

my pride rule my heart

and dictate my thoughts

I was a fool to think

I have self made success

I was a fool to think individually

I was a fool to put faith in money and plans

countless days spent worrying about how I look

and blinded by the lies of the world

Now I look at the person I have become

and thank the LORD for touching my heart

my priorities are now in the right place

I am still poor as before

still just head above water as before

still working to pay off debt as before

still unsure of what tomorrow will bring

just like before, and yet……..

my mountain of problems seem small

my burdens light

my worries and stress washed away

This change, I assure you

is not because I got married

or work for a US agency

or read the bible

or stopped going to night clubs

or quit smoking

or that my mother told me so

It is simply because I have FULLY accepted

HIM as my GOD

And I have given him room

to work his miracles in my life